Do you watch Lucifer? I love Lucifer. Not the 666 devil of course. I always say i don't watch t.v., but I do binge a lot of netflix.
If someone could see through your thoughts, what is it that they would see? What is it that you desire? I am in a confusing time right now I think. I really had a time in PA for work. It was an awful couple days. Way too much self reflection. Way too much.
I feel like I am always in a cycle of self reflection. I want to learn and grow everyday, but right now, I just don't see the point. 29 days in a row of work was too many. Then to travel on top of it, for work, was too much. I have never experienced a moment when it was too much, and it happened last week. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed by it, and I don't know how to manage it.
Am I the only one who desires things that are not really hard to obtain? Peace. Quiet. Is it too much. Sometimes I get online at chaturbate and it literally can change my mood from not great to much better. It isn't tokens. It is the no stress, no pressure of it.
My life has a lot of pressure in it. It's easy to forget that on chaturbate.
While I was gone, I really thought about coming back and abandoning chaturbate and phone sex, and trying to be "normal". I don't want to be "normal", but I do want peace and quiet.
I got online yesterday and was reminded how much I like to do it. What a good distraction it is for me, from my reality. I got online tonight, and the same thing happened. Instead of abandoning it, I am going to continue to relish in it. I appreciate the peace of it. I hope sometimes I can bring peace to others also.
So if Lucifer asks me, what it is that I desire...peace for all of us.
xoxo
Jenni
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