He called me a gypsy

"a nomadic or free-spirited person"

A friend of mine was in a fairly catastrophic motorcycle accident on the 4th of July. In his words, he got in a fight with a tree and a motorcycle, and he lost. I was sitting in the hospital with him last week, and a guy from his work was there. He asked me if I was my friend's sister. Haha! My friend said "nah, she's my gypsy". I would say that is accurate, but only he would ever use that word to describe me. I haven't seen this guy in about 3 years, despite him living 10 miles from me. But...he is literally the person who I would want to hold my hand on my death bed. We aren't even friends on Facebook. He came very close to death, and so lucky to be alive. I spent an evening last week compiling a list of every memory I could think of with him, and I determined I have more memories with him than any other person in life.

In the early days of my blog, I would write about having cuddle naps with him. He is literally the only person I have ever trusted 100%. And we would literally have cuddle naps. More because he needed them, but I obliged him. He has been with me for every up and every down in my entire life. He is my son's God Father, and he rolled up on his Harley for that, right on time. He looks like Kid Rock and I was his wing woman (though he never really needed it), and he my wing man (and he always hated that). He was with me when I had my first 1 nightstand. He told me not to do it. We have slept under the stars, gone to funerals, celebrated births, shared meals and drinks. He was part of my kids' lives and me his kids' lives. My ex even went to visit him last week, but to be fair, they were friends before he and I were friends. When my ex and I started dating, he told me not to do it. Then they became less friends.

He has been a problem in every relationship I have ever had, and me him. The only difference was, I didn't let men have their way about it. He was a part of me, and if you didn't like that, you'd have to get over it. Maybe he was more kind with the women in his life who despised our relationship. He would cut me off. I accepted it, because I knew it didn't really matter. He was still my best friend.

When I texted him the other night to see if I could come see him, he said "is this my Jenn". I've never been so happy to be called someone's "my".

We are complicated. The first 15 years we were just friends, even though everyone thought we weren't. Then on my 30th birthday, we went to the strip club with 2 of my friends, and we all got shit faced. He and I went to a park on the way home, in the middle of the night. I literally fell down a ravine as I was bent over a tree stump (cannot make this up). My clothes were half off, and I ended up with poison ivy ALL over my body, and little burrs stuck all throughout my hair. That was hard to explain to people and still is a great story. We didn't have sex again until 10 years later. His dad had died, and he was lost, and I was there. He had a gf at the time, but in his grief, she was not pleased that I was there, and they broke up. His kids would ask me to save him from himself. I sat with him every night, for such a long time. Turns out it didn't help. He wanted to numb the pain, and I didn't want him to have any pain. Life moved on. He and I moved on. I couldn't help him, and it hurt.

When I went to see him the other night, he has a new girlfriend, that inevitably will hate me, because she doesn't understand. His daughter called and he had me answer the phone, and she says, "oh shit, jenn!", and then he had me stay until she got there. Time will never change how much I love and adore this man and am grateful he is alive. I forgot that I need him in my life, but I never forgot that he is the only person who I trust with my life.

So, if you wonder where I've been, outside of the truck, it has been with him. Yes, I went to a disco themed party the other night. That was groovy baby, but tomorrow I go back to work, and back to the hospital, because I believe love can heal.

I truly hope that you all have someone in your life that you want to hold your hand on your death bed, and if you don't that you find that person.